Emotional intelligence, according to the book by Daniel Goleman with the same title, is what allows us to be aware of our emotions, understand others feelings, tolerate the pressure and frustration we endure at work, emphasizing our ability to work together and adopt an empathic and social attitude, which will give us more opportunities for personal development.
A worldwide investigation by The Consortium for Research on Emotional Intelligence in Organizations yielded a surprising result linked to our success quotient result: the same that according to this study is due to 23% of our intelligence quotient (IQ), and 77% of our emotional intelligence. I think our emotions is what most defines us as human beings and activate from what is important to us and what we believe about ourselves and the world.
In past times, society has greatly appreciated intelligent people especially in the areas of science and their IQ was measured through “intelligence tests”. This caused without a reason that many young people with a lower IQ required were not supported and recognized, creating a future of difficult personal and professional gaps to fill.
Howard Gardner, is the creator of the multiple intelligences theory, a member of Project Zero at Harvard (dedicated to the study of the learning process in children and adults) and was named one of the 100 intellectuals who most has influenced the current world by the magazine Foreign Policy in 2005. In his book Multiple Intelligences, broadens the scope of what is intelligence and recognizes what was known intuitively: that academic brilliance is not everything and that when it comes to function in life is not enough to have a great academic record.
There are people with great intellectual capacity but unable to, for example, choose their friends well; on the contrary, there are less bright people at school who succeed in the world of business or in their private life. Succeed in business, or in sports, requires intelligence, but in each field a different kind of intelligence is used. Neither better nor worse, but different. In other words: Einstein is nothing more nor less intelligent than Michael Jordan, just their intelligences belong to different fields. Gardner defines eight multiple intelligences, which are linguistic, logical-mathematical, spatial, bodily, musical, naturalist, interpersonal and intrapersonal intelligence (the last two being part of emotional intelligence).
Until very recently intelligence was considered as something innate. One was born smart or not, and seemingly education could not do anything about it, when in fact it exists the innate part and the acquire part, let’s remember that skills are developed through practice, perseverance, effort and discipline.
Gandhi said that laughter costs nothing and produces alot; it enriches those who receive without impoverishing those who give and that nobody needs a smile more than who cannot give it others. I reflected on the importance of being kind to people, to give a word of affection, a compliment, a heartfelt hug, a genuine smile and leave aside for example judging, pointing, criticism, that is useless because it puts the other person on a defensive position and generally seeks to justify itself; it is harmful because it hurts the pride that is so precious in people, hurts his sense of importance, and arouses resentment.
The famous psychologist BF Skinner proved by animal experiments that rewarding good behavior, the animals learned faster than punishing bad behavior and subsequent studies showed the same thing in humans; that through criticism we never provoke lasting changes and often create resentment. Also, Dale Carnegie in his book How to Win Friends and Influence People, he says, “As much as yearn for approval, we fear the sentence”; resentment engendered criticism can demoralize employees, friends and family.
I wrote an article about Nelson Mandela before he died because I grieved the idea that suddenly he will be no longer with us. I wrote about this great man and extraordinary human being that will soon leave us, certainly leaving a huge void in the world; to express my deep admiration for Nelson Mandela for his legacy to humanity, his courage, his humility and his great heart. No doubt he was possessed of great emotional intelligence, a man without a trace of hatred or resentment, someone who was twenty-seven years imprisoned unjustly and left without revenge against his captors. Our Nobel Peace Prize winner was definitely one of our past heroes; I hope there would more people like him.
I am convinced that we all have the potential to develop our emotional intelligence, which will make us happier, and make people happier around us. What do we have to do? Develop these five factors in our lives: self-knowledge, self-control, motivation, empathy and social skills. Good luck in finding its rediscovery!
Coach, Consultant and Facilitator in areas of development of human potential.
International Certification Consulting, Coaching, Mentoring and Leadership. High Specialization Master in Coaching and Leadership International Training in Systemic Coaching. Senior Executive, Industrial Engineer with 15 years of experience in the areas of Planning and Projects; currently he dedicated to the areas of Coaching, Management Systems Consulting, Facilitation, Teaching and Mentoring. Committed to the development of people and a culture of humane leadership.